Thursday, April 26, 2007

Ja-Jini

P.S -1 : I am re-writing Ja-Jini , the spoof I started some time back in November 2006. Re-write na muzhusume illa….continuing where I left, appuram, wherever I felt like asking myself "loosappa nee" ;), for writing without logic, angae lam made some changes.... (innamum logic udhaikkuthunu feel panna free ya vidunga:D). Ppl who have read already kindly read again :), while starters ready ishtartttt…….. :D

JA - JINI (Till Part III)









P.S - 1 : Ja-Jini na ennanu muzhikka koodathu......... athu Java Jini nu artham with va as silent....... :D


P.S – 2: Ithula appapa Manmadhan, Vallavan lam varuvanga kandukka koodathu.. Story ippo elutharathu April maathathil -ngarathala namma Srikanth kooda etti paarparu ;) ). So imagine something like Ghajini story with Simbu as hero ;)


i. Part I
ii. Part II
iii. Part III




Part I

Scene - 1

State of the Art MNC company..... Software development work going on...tak tak tak Keyboard sounds everywhere..... Programmers were busy in their coding. PM's were busy analyzing where to goof the data to extract more money from the client, Certain section of the ppl were busy fighting (read as Team meeting) among themselves….Few were staring at the monitor giving the impression of analyzing a problem  Okiee the thing is everyone were seriously doing something.... Another part of the wing la oru Conference room la a group of Team members meet together to select resources for a new, large project that they are part of. Nayanthara is one of the team member in that group nu naan solla vendiyathillae ninaikaren.. They wer screening the profiles of many employees in their business unit who could fit into the requirements... athula oru resume of one Mr.Ramasamy looked very interesting and suitable for the skill set that the project demanded.... Namma project ku intha guy than suitable ah iruppan nu suggest panranga Nayantara and the PL nods his head in acceptance.


Scene - 2

Ramasamy's resume ah zoom panni kaatarom..... appadiye zoom out panna athai pidichi paarthuttu irukkaru antha Business Unit manager Sonaachalam.. "Intha paiyana unga project la podanumnu yaaru Idea koduthathu"... appdinu ketkuraru. Suthi Nayanthara , her PL and other team mates irukkanga. Ellarum oruthara oruthar paarthukiranga.... Nayantara comes forward...

"Naan than sir propose pannen... avanaiye konjam pesi mudichidunga..."

Sonaachalam tension aagararu, " ei, ennamo kalyanathukku mappilai paarthu mudichidungannu tharagar kitta solra maathiri solre......"..

Nayantara "hehee athu illa sir, intha resource enga project ku suit aagumnu thonichu..why not we take him"....

Sonaachalam tension aagararu "ivan unga project ku venam nu sonna vittudaen..... if you insist, then I would have to talk to the consultancy thru which you have joined this company" nu solraaru...

Nayantara udane surrender aayidaranga..consultancy kitta pesina fake experience pottu ulla vanthathu therinjidume..."Sari sari sir, namma project ku venaam...atleast ivana pathi therinjukka nanga aasai padarom..Konjam solungalen" apadinu ketkaranga....

"Sariyana jolla irukkum pola irukke" nu thalaila adichikittu, Sonaachalam, Ramasamy yoda appraisal PPT ah thedi pidichu eduthu athai thannoda system la pottu padam kaamikarar ella ponnunga kittayum......... Oru story interest kaga avare explain panraar Ramasamy pathi....


"Ivar peru "Sun Java" Ramasamy... Yaaro ivar per la UAT la niraya high severity bugs pottirukkanga, to be completed within short time nu solli. ivarala 15 nimishathuku mela entha coding ah yo illa logic ah yo nyabagam vachikka mudiyaathu..avvalavu work pressure.."

Nayantara, "appo ivar eluthara code, code ku thevaiyana logic??"

Sonaachalam "Ellame 15 nimisham than.... mudhal nimisham eluthara code apply panra logic ellame 15 nimishathukku appuram konjam konjama maranthu poidum... UAT la pottirukara bugs mattum than nyabagam irukum..vera ellame marainjidum ivar memory la irunthu"

Nayantara "Java la egapata classes, packages lam irukae...ellathaiyum eppadi nyabagam vachippar?"

Sonaachalam "Chinna pasanga exam la bit adikarathukaga niraya chinna chinna paper la kirukki vachippanga illiya... athe pola than ivarum niraya stick-it paper la ivar panra ellathaiyum eluthi vachikkuvaaru..... class name, package name la irunthu for, if loop syntax varaikkum ellathaiyum antha stick-it paper la than eluthi vachipparu"

Nayantara ku ithai kettavudane ore feelings "Oru fresher ku kooda theriyara chinna chinna vishayam kooda eluthi vachithan seiyyanumna ivar life evvalo kashtama irukkanum.. ippa enna pannitu irukkaro"

Scene – 3

enna pannitu irukkaro nu nayantara mudikarangalla antha idathula scene 2 cut aagi "bangggggggggg" apadinu oru sathathoda scene 3 open panrom...athu onnum illa, namma Ramsaamy oru bug kooda poraadittu irukkaru..antha bug ah fix panrathuku..athai symbolic ah oru fighting scene alavukku build up kodukkarom…. Night time, yaarume pakkathula illa. Ramsamy antha bug oda poraadittu irukaru…….. Oru vazhiya correct ah na idathula code ah sorugi (insert panni) antha bug ah fix pannidarar. Appo avaroda mobile phone la set pannirukara alarm adikkuthu…15 minutes ku orukka adikkara alarm athu…antha gap kulla fix pannathan undu… illena ethai fix pannitu irukkom ne maranthuduvaru Avasara avasarama thankitta irukkara excel sheets ellathaiyum, ippo fix panna bug kooda compare pani paarkurar.psssssst… avarukku assign panniruntha bug kidayathu ippo avar fix pannathu…. Night la kuzhappathula thappa vera etho system la utkarnthu vera etho project la ulla bug ah fix pannitar Ramsamy instead of what he aimed to fix. Oru disappointment oh da antha idathai vittu, confusion oda pinnadi pinnadi thirumba paarthukitte night 2 mani CAB ah pidikka poraaru Ramsamy.



Next day morning… Vazhakam pola 10 manikku vara Ilango thannoda cubicle la coffee kotti antha idam full ah E moichittu irukkaratha paarthu athirchi aagararu..munthina naal avar lock panama vittuitu poiruntha PC la yaaro work pannirukkanga.. Another shock, avar work pannitu iruntha oru bug fix ah vera yaaro complete panirukanga… nyayama paartha avar santhosa padanum nu neenga ninaipeenga… avar kashtam avarukku…….. Appraisal ku kanakku kamika antha oru bug fix than vachirunthaaru. Athaiyum yaaro fix pannitanga, ippa Ilango ennatthai kaamipaaru. Sema upset agi feelings oda thannoda team mate Riyaz khan kitta solraru. Riyaz khan udane ithai investigate panraennu sollitu kilambararu. Following the stinking espresso coffee Ramsamy has spilt in Ilango's cubicle, athai moppam pidichitte correct ah Ramasamy cubicle poidararu.... Cubicle la thannoda chair la utkarnthu tired ah Ramasamy thoongikittu irukkaru...Sema Project pressure nala pala naal shave pannama, kulikkama ore azhukka, irukkaru Ram..... Riyaz khan avara ezhuppa try panraaru "dei enthirida enthirida" nu solli... but waste...nalla adichi potta mathiri Ram thoongikittu irukkaru....antha cubicle ah suthi suthi paarkarar ethuna clue kidaikkuma nu...cubicle la niraya idathula pala stick it paper otta pattu irukku……. "She has found a bug" , "Find it! Fix it!", "2 done 8 to go" … intha maathiri pala pala one liners… mathapadi clue nu onnum kidaikkale……. Sari ntu, Riyaz khan monitor ah switch on panni paarkiraru… Ramasamy PC yum lock panama than iruku....Ramasamy open panni vachirukkara application, browser windows lam paarkiraru Riyaz. ovvoru opened windows ah parthuttu vara Riyaz khan kannu la Ramasamy oda Blog site kannu la paduthu....... Kittathatta personal diary maathiri thannai pathi Ramasamy athula appapa eluthi vachirukkaru polirukku. Archives ah click panni Ramsamy history ah therinjukkalam nu ninaichittu andha blog la post aana first Post ah click panraar.....



Flashback starts.................

Part II



(ithula appapa Ramsamy pesarathu, duet paadurathu lam varum…. Blog la ithellam audio blog ah pottirukara, illa ithai padikkira riyaz khan lyrics padichu avarae paadurara nu lam ketka koodathu…. Original Ghajini la eppadi Surya diary la thannai pathi sollumbothe kaiyoda kaiya Asin intro kaga Rahathula song lyrics oda eluthiruntharo,athe logic padi than ingayum paatu varuthu ;) )

[Sun Java Ramasamy voice la aarambikuthu flashback]

En peru Ramasamy..muzhu peru Sun Java Ramasamy. Ennoda pozhuthupokku, thozhil rendume Coding than. College la ella solli solli goat adicha naan kaala maatrathula oru MNC la vanthu code adichittu irukkaen. Latchiyam nan sernthirukara company vazhiyavae onsite ponum, periya aalu aaganumngarathu than. Pidicha oor Chennai. En sight irukkara oor. Ethaiyume perisa aasaipattu perusa uzhaikkanumnu enga appa solvaaru.. Athu polave naanum chinna oru assignment na kooda athukku egappata lines of code adichi, athai support panna onsite ku perusu perusaa mail anupichitu irukaen.

Ithu thaan ennoda office. Monday Tuesday lam nanga tie kattitu than varuvom..(intha pic chumma fresher ah join pannumbothu vanthathu... ID card photo la style ah varathukkaga we came in coat..avlothan....)




Bench la bench thechittu iruntha ennai thooki oru periya project la pottanga... aaha appadinu perumaiya ulla vantha, appuram than therinjathu antha application laye enkitta koduthathu than vivagaramana module, vera ellorum athai reject panitanganu. Ippa naan panitu irukkara project la epadiyavathu 1 lakh lines of code eluthidanumngarathu than ennoda Project Manager enakku vachirukkara target...

(From this dialog Ramasamy pesaratha kaamikarom) Aachariyama irukka?...nambikkai kum bad management kum naduvula nool alavu than vithiyasam... Ennala oru task ah handle panna mudiyum nu solrathu en mela company vachirukkara nambikkai... Ennala mattum than antha module handle panna mudiyum nu solrathu bad management. Ena panrathu, client oda requirement kum enga company policy kum balance panrathuku intha mathiri kidaikkara resource ah than pulinjittu irukanga...


intha mathiri ramasamy pesi mudikarar Food court la friends munnadi... avar pesi mudichavudane avar friends lam kai thattranga...ivar pesinathukku kai thattinanga nu ninaichikatheenga.... ellorum Food court la mixture um coffee yum saptanga...athai saptutu kaiyai thatti thudachikaranga avlothan....

Ramasamy eh sonna maathiri romba critical ah na oru project la oru critical ah na module ah oru critical ah na time la handle panna vendiya assignment koduthirukkanga.. aathi (mudhal) la handle panitu irutha oruthar paathi la ponathu nala meethi la mudikkara poruppu namma ramasamy thalaikku vanthuduchu...

First lam intha module iruntha complexity Ramasamy ku sariya therila.... etho onnu rendu coding mattum complete pannale athai easy ah mudichidalam nu free ya vittutaru.. appuram than code internal testing la irunthu Independent Testing team ku pochu.. Kalpana nu oru tester than Ramasamy module ah test panrathukku assign pannirunthanga... anga aarambichathu Ramasamy oda vinai... Ramasamy module la daily bug mela bug ah kandupidikka aarambichanga Kalpana.. Evening time la kalpana scribble pad ah thookikitu thannoda cubicle pakkam doubt ketka / bug solrathukku, varatha paarthalae podhum, Ramasami ku beethi kilappikum...... appuram enna escape thaan

Tune : "Oru maalai.."

"Oru maalai ila veyil neram... Azhagana ilai uthir kaalam...
Satru tholaivinil aval mugam paarthen..Ange tholainthavan nane....

Aval alli vitta bug -gal, nadu naduve konjam doubt-gal
ithazhoram sirippodu kettu konden naane...
Aval nindru pesum sila nimisham
Ennai maati vaikkum oru vishamam
verkum padiye avalidam nindrene..nindrene....

(Oru maalai…)



Ippadi aarambathula ethuna sakku pokku soli Ramsamy escape aayitu irunthar kalpana kitta irunthu........ aana oru naal onsite la irunthu aapu vachanga Ramsamy ku..kalpana open pannirukkara bugs lam close aagama romba naal irukku..udane close pannidanum..athuvum UAT ku poga munnadi nu....... athula irunthu PM, PL la irunthu ellorume semma pressure kodukka aarambikaranga.. paavam ramasamy...avarukku antha module pathi onnume theriyathu...etho panna sonnanga panninar, athu sariyavum work pannanumnu sonna avar enna pannuvar.... 5'0 clock kilambara office bus ku 4:30 ke poi seat reserve pannitu iruntha Ramsamy anniku la irunthu oru naal vanthutu maru naal poga aarambichar.. ithu pathi lam kavalai padatha Kalpana daily pala vithamana bugs ah open pannikite than irunthanga.... Man ah iruntha Ramsamy ah An Mad Man ah alaiya vittutanga... (thiruppi pottu padinga, Manamadan link ungalukku kidaikkum :p). Oru naal night sogathula Ramasamy paadura paatu ithu



Tune : Kaadhal valarthen (Manmadhan)


Code valarthen...Code valarthen
unnal dhane unnal nanum pennae Code valarthen
Code valarthen...Code valarthen
Coding mela Coding panni Code valarthen

Eh, tracker-il than pennae neeyum bug poda code valarthen,
endru athai nee close seiyyum varai code valarpen..

eh pullae pullae...nee enga padiche
eh pullae pullae...bug kandu pidiche
eh pullae pullae...vaati eduthe
eh pullae pullae...sunday vara vache...
eh pullae..........eh pullae (ithu echo, konjam light ah paadavum)

(saranam)

unnai thavira ingu
enathu problem yaradi
unnal ingu naan nightout adichen

unathu bug adhu
escalate aagi
iravu nerathilum code adichen

bug engae nu parkave
en arivu thedidum
vidiyum nerathile veedu selgirean naanadi..

Fix-kenave kaathirunthale
Build team tension aagum
Project-il waiting kodumai thaane..thane...

minor bugs(u) pirar paarkum varai,
internal bugs athu PM varai,
Independent testing-il nee tharum bug oh UAT -u pogum varai....adiyee
eh pullae pullae...
(code valarthen....)


ippadi nondhu noodles aayitu irukkara ramasami mela team la ulla ellorum parithaba padaranga.... aanalum testing team kalpana ku mattum thannoda full thiramai ya kaamichu pudhusu pudhusa bug pottutu than irukanga... UAT date nerunga nerunga, pressure Ramasamy mela ekkachakama..illa, namma sneha solra maathiri, ekka chakka chakkama eruthu..... satharana vishayamana sapidarathu, thoongarathu koooda nimmathiya panna mudiyale paavam.. Eppa paarthalum phone call, PM ku explain panrathu, en innum mudikkale nu Onsite kitta vilakam solrathu, bug illaenu Kalpana kitta argum panrathu ithulaye day full ah poiduma..apuram bug ah yaaru fix panrathu, athukkaga night out adichu coding adikkarathu... ithu than avar nilaimai. Idhai ninaichu avar paadurar kelunga



Tune : Loosu pennae (vallavan)

Loosu pennae Loosu Pennae loosu pennae...
Loosu paiyan en mela than Bug ah podara...

Eh Loosu pennae Loosu Pennae loosu pennae...
Loosu paiyan en mela than Bug ah podara...

paavam varatha....paavam varaatha
en mel en mel unakku paavam varaatha

kaalai mudhal naalai varai
dhinamum thane ingae vanthu coding pannuren
Kangal moodi thoongumbothum
PM-oda call vanthu ennai ezhupputhe....vanthu mudikka soluthe..
(Loosu pennae)



Part III
Ippadi kashta pattutu irukkara Ramaswamy Enough is Enough appadinu mudivu panni, nera PM kitta poi solraru…. "Sorry sir, ennala ithukku mela coding panna mudiyathu, intha application etho kaatula anganga kanni vedi vacha maathiri irukku, enga ethai thotta vedikkum ne therila……. I don't want to further risk by adding more code and getting more and more errors and spoil my life nu"………. Oru kindly voice la PM solraaru…"Sorry Mr.Ramaswamy, namma company ku intha project ah vitta vera project eh illa, so Client solrathai kettu than aaganum…….. time pathi kavalai padatheenga……. Neenga evlo neram naalum work panni nalaikkulla ella bugs ah yum close pannidunga" .. Ramaswamy feel panraaru… adappavi…… ennamo dharala manasu maathiri evlo neram nalum work pannu na, appo company laye naan dera adikanuma……no……never apadinu urumuraru…… urumunaalum irumunaalum enna prayajonam…..panna vendiya velaliya panni thane aaganum………

Meanwhile Kalpana comes to Ramaswamy's cubicle, to inform him about another bug she has just found in his module. She cracks joke about Ramaswamy's module and could not control her laughter about the state of the application right now. Light ah na oru sirippoda athai kettukira Ramaswamy, kalpana sirichi mudichavudane ketkuraru….

Ramaswamy : (in a soft voice) Bugs ellam close pannidu

Kalpana is like, stunned…… sirippu ninnu poiduthu, she is lost for words…..

Kalpana : huh?

Ramaswamy : Please close all of these bugs as 'Fixed'. Naama client testing panrappo paarthukkalam…

Kalpana : (shockingly) enna thideernu

Ramaswamy : thonichu

Kalpana : illa, ithu varaikkum ethanaiyo application la bugs pottirukken. Orutharum enkitta ippadi kettathu illa ..athan nee thideernu kettavudane enakku enna solrathunu therila. Naan konjam yosikkanum. Nalaikku kalaila sollatuma?

Ramaswamy : Mhmm..OK

Kalpana : aana pidikkalai na mudiyathu nu solliduvaen..thappa ninaikka koodathu

Ramaswamy : (smilingly) O.K

Kalpana confused thoughts oda : Office bus ku time aayiduchi. Nalaikku paarkalam, O.K bye nu sollitu kilambi poraanga, Ramaswamy decides to himself.

"Nalaikku Kalpana O.K nu sonna nane kandupidicha bugs lam ava kitta solli avalukku nalla per vaangi tharanum. Oru velai mudiyathu nu sonna…… (pause)…….oru velai mudiyathu nu sonna..appadiye leave pottu escape aayiduven… ethuva irunthalum nalaikku theriyum….."

Intha maathiri antha post mudiyuthu…. Idhai padichittu iruntha Riyaz khan appadiye intha story la moozhgi poidarara……..tak nu paathi la mudinjavudane kaduppu aayidararu, aduthu enna nadanthathu nu theriyama… vera link kidaikkuma nu antha page la thedi paarkuraru, but he could find none.. Athu marubadi main page vanthu Archives la thedi paartha kidaikkum nu paavam avarukku therila.. "Dei engae da intha story continuation" appadinu Ramaswami ya ezhuppi paarkuraru, but avaru lesa kan muzichu paarkurare thavira enthirukkara maathiri kaanom…… Huh appadinu oru aathirathoda Riyaz khan anga irunthu poidararu.

- To be continued



Reactions:

5 comments:

fun2fun said...

naane first!! yaay!!:)
seri padichutu vandhu appala innoru comment podren!!

Karthik B.S. said...

naane secondu! Yeyeye! :)

Karthik B.S. said...

naan padikaama ipppo onnnoru commment podddren! :D

Krithika said...

yes i remember..will keep checkin back

Ed said...

I think I am the only person in this city who didn't see the movie (Gajini and not Ja-Jini :) )
even though I was invited... grr. I should have gone. Hilarious spoof. lol @ the loose penne song and the Sun Java Ramasamy. I will be joining Java classes this coming vacation. I will come back and read again so that it will make more sense.

BTW, May 14th is the blog's day of completion of 1 year...